


Birthday Treat

by S_Faith



Category: Bridget Jones's Diary (2001), Bridget Jones's Diary - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-02-28
Updated: 2008-02-28
Packaged: 2019-03-14 13:54:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13591455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/S_Faith/pseuds/S_Faith
Summary: A birthday shopping excursion leads to interesting purchases…





	Birthday Treat

**Author's Note:**

> Notes: Written in about an hour and a half, in celebration of the publication of the first of the Bridget columns on 28 Feb 1995. Hurrah! \o/ And also to commemorate [](http://just-dreamsome.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://just-dreamsome.livejournal.com/)**just_dreamsome** 's birthday on Saturday. Double hurrah! \o/ \o/
> 
> Disclaimer: NOT. MINE.

"It's your birthday," he asked, "and you're surprising _me_?"

She grinned, taking him by the hand and pulling him closer to the nondescript-looking storefront. Tinted windows obscured the store's specialty and nothing about the outside of it gave the slightest indication of the wares it sold. He was extremely puzzled and very curious where they could be going. "It's not completely altruistic on my part," she assured, squeezing his fingers tightly.

She pushed open the door, setting a small tinkling bell to hysterics. As the door closed and their eyes adjusted to the lower light levels within, her face lit up just as his fell in abject horror.

It was absolutely high-class, tastefully decorated in creams and burgundies and soft cello music playing, with smiling sales people ready to cater to their every whim, but when all was said and done, it was nothing but a…

He felt her finger push upon the dimple in his chin to set his mouth closed again. "Don't tell me you haven't been in a sex toy shop before," she said devilishly.

"Darling," he said darkly, "don't tell me you _have_."

She burst out with a little laugh. "Come now," she said, unwilling to relinquish the hand he sought to recover, "and help me to pick out something for my birthday."

When he took a second look at the fancily-lettered signs on the walls, he realised the store was parceled out into different areas of focus. It was as if he was outside himself watching the scene, and he resisted the urge to gasp when she pulled him close to an area sporting silicone phalluses in downright modern-art shapes and colours.

"What would you need _that_ for?" he asked under his breath as she picked up a particularly abstract model of impressive proportions styled in cobalt blue.

She set down the item she'd been inspecting then looked up to him sympathetically, obviously fighting the urge to giggle, and brought herself close to him, popping up on her toes. He must have looked like a mournful puppy. "My interest in _these_ has nothing whatsoever to do with my dissatisfaction of _this_ ," she said in a near-whisper; he felt her fingers lightly but covertly sweep across the front of his trousers. She kissed him quickly on the lips before returning her heels to the floor.

He cleared his throat and remained mute as he reluctantly followed her to another section; this time his eyes took in, quite against his will, an array of apparently vibrating items of various shapes and sizes, most of them at least life-sized if not life-like, although there was one with a rabbit on it that made him wonder. His gaze landed on what appeared to be a very small box, too small to be anatomically proportioned in any sense, and out of curiosity he picked it up to read the packaging.

As if it were burning with white hot flame he dropped it back into place.

"Oh," she said, glancing back to pick up what he'd dropped and reading what he had only just read. "Ohh," she repeated, her voice dropping down into a downright sensual timbre. "'Remote-controlled', hmm?"

He then felt that white hot flame rush over his own features, partly for having been caught examining such an item, and partly for where his imagination had taken him: January's Turkey Curry buffet, the subtle push of a button, the quiet controlled shifting in her seat and the flash of her blue eyes as they met his own…

"That has definite possibilities," she added impishly. "As does this." She picked up another box, a corded number he'd seen in mainstream stores marketed as a 'personal massager'. He was afraid he'd never be able to go shopping in household appliances again.

"I wasn't taking stock," he said gruffly.

"Oh, you'd better be. We're walking out of here with something."

They continued making the rounds and she made a squeal of delight as an assortment of beaded and bejeweled rings far too large for one's fingers. She turned her face to him and raised a solitary eyebrow.

"I think not," he said without hesitation.

The exaggerated pout on her lips was sexy beyond words, but he was not about to give her the satisfaction of knowing he thought so. "We'll just keep looking," she said, undeterred.

She then became rather engrossed in a tasteful selection of intimate apparel, and it was then, in looking away from her, that his eyes fixed upon a section that he thought might actually hold promise. He was able to disengage his hand from hers without her noticing and wander away to that section of the shop. He located something he was very interested in possessing, and was able to purchase it and secrete it away before she realised he was gone.

"Did you find something you like?" he asked quietly as he rejoined her side.

"Oh, yes, I think so. Feel how lovely this silk is. It's like nothing at all."

His fingers brushed across the fabric and it was most assuredly the finest quality silk he'd ever touched. "If you want it, it's yours," he said quietly, "though I must admit its pleasure will only be a momentary one."

Of all the items they'd perused in this store, it amazed him that it was this simple statement that made her cheeks go pink.

They took the camisole set to the register; he deftly indicated to the sales clerk with a glance alone to remain silent about the transaction they had already completed. She queried if he might not also buy her one of those little remote-controlled items or the corded massager; he feigned resistance before caving in and suggesting she take both. Her eyes lit up with glee and she went back for them.

As the sales clerk put the purchases into a brown sack, she asked, "Is there nothing you'd particularly like?"

"These purchases," he began, "are not completely altruistic on my part."

She grinned, looking rather smug and triumphant.

It was not until they arrived back at her flat, after she had stripped and dressed into the silk nightie set, that he revealed his secret acquisition. Her eyes went wide with surprise as he slipped the mitt over his hand. He approached her, put one arm around her waist, brushed the soft fur against the curve of her arse; he heard her breath catch in her throat.

"What's a birthday," he growled in her ear, "without a spanking?"

_The end…? ;)_

**Author's Note:**

> Ha ha, my browser history looks perv-o-rific right now. **These are not safe for work!**
> 
>   * [Remote controlled buzz…](http://www.goodvibes.com/Item--i-1-2-AJ-0611)
>   * [The Cadillac…!](http://www.goodvibes.com/Item--i-1-1-AB-BE01--m-34)
>   * [You thought I was kidding about the rabbit, didn't you?](http://www.goodvibes.com/Item--i-1-2-AL-0202--m-38)
>   * [Um. ;)](http://www.goodvibes.com/ItemList--Penis-Rings--m-18) [This one 404s, sorry] 
>   * ["…and a pinch to grow an inch!"](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanking#Birthday_spanking)
> 



End file.
